I was reminded today how I feel about romance novels and feminism by hearing about a graduate student asking writers questions about this. So I dug out a presentation I gave circa 2000 on the subject. Here is a portion of it:
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Some
people think romance and feminism couldn’t possibly go together.
My reaction is that romance novels are some of the most feminist
writing around and I’d like to tell you why I think that.
First
of all, let me say that I really am a feminist. I grew up in the
50’s and 60’s and I remember watching shows like Bewitched. I
always wanted to ask Samantha why on earth she was letting some guy
tell her what she could do with her gifts and talents!
I
grew up being told that women could not do mathematics. I didn’t
listen—which is why my undergraduate degree is in honors math and
my graduate degree is in operations research. I don’t listen well.
So
when it came time to write—the year my husband and I were living in
Paris, France--it seemed natural to look at what kind of books were
on the market and what I wanted to write about. I knew how many women
read romance. Heck, I was reading romance. But I wasn’t always
happy with the images in those books. So I decided to try to write
one where the characters were the same age and—surprise,
surprise!—the heroine was a mathematician. To my utter
astonishment, Avalon books wanted to publish my work. So I wrote a
few more. During this time my son was born with down syndrome and I
said I’d get a 9 to 5 job when he was a little older. That was 23
years ago and I’m still writing romance!
Why
do I love writing romance? And why do I think romance novels are
feminist? Because the best romances celebrate women learning to be
true to themselves. They celebrate women overcoming obstacles and
creating the lives they want to have. And they portray men and women
coming together in ways that empower both of them—so that neither
is diminished and each is greater than he or she would be alone. And
to me that’s feminism—to celebrate the possibilities—for both
women AND men!
Romance
novels were the first to show women in careers such as lawyers,
doctors, heads of companies. Women in romance novels no longer wait
for a knight in shining armor to rescue them. They are just as
likely to not only rescue themselves but help the guy out as well.
In the best of situations the men and women help each other. And
isn’t that what we would like in our own lives? Not to live in
armed camps but to work together to create more than we could each
accomplish alone?
Romance
novels are about possibilities. About ways to rise above the
obstacles we find in our lives. To overcome the tragedies and
traumas and find a way to triumph. And I think that’s one of the
most empowering messages anyone can hear.
Now
I’ll grant you, I write Regencies. You won’t find female lawyers
in my books. But you will find women living in a time of
change—because the Regency era mirrors our own in that
respect—trying to balance what they feel they owe their families
and society with the need to be true to who they are. And isn’t
that the challenge we all face in our own lives? My characters are,
I hope, true to their time but that doesn’t mean they are
pushovers.
In
The Wily Wastrel, Juliet’s mother wanted a dainty Juliet. Juliet isn’t
dainty—or classically feminine. She rather fix a carriage wheel
than sew a seam. She gets matched up with a guy who has to pretend
he wins his money gambling because it’s disreputable to earn money
if you were a gentleman back then. So both have to deal with
expectations and how to be true to themselves anyway.
In
The Sentimental Soldier, Prudence doesn’t hesitate to masquerade as a Moroccan Prince
or a male gypsy, and as a nun for good measure.
In
Miss Tibbles Interferes, Mrs. Merriweather is a former governess. She has to deal not
only with the expectations for women, but for former governesses as
well—even though being married to a colonel now makes her a lady.
And nothing ever stops her from doing anything she thinks needs to be
done!
Probably
my most feminist heroine is Penelope in An Outrageous Proposal. She was never going to
get married because she was never going to let any guy tell her what
to do—no way, no how, not ever! Well, the hero manages to change
her mind, but not without changing a few of his own ideas along the
way.
The
point is that in romance novels—mine or most other writers these
days, you will find strong women, taking charge of their lives,
overcoming all sorts of obstacles to create the lives they want to
have. And they find ways to do it without throwing away the ties to
that people who matter to them. And that’s important. Because the
most profound fear any of us has is that of being abandoned. Babies
who are not loved literally die—it’s called failure to thrive.
The message in these books is that you can be true to yourself and
along the way maybe still find someone who shares your vision. And
that may be enough to give all of us the courage to try. And what
could be more feminist than that?
