I've never had to go to war (though some might argue my childhood WAS a war zone, it's still not the same thing). I haven't lost a family member to war either. I've been lucky that way.
I think too often we've found ourselves in wars that should never have happened. But that doesn't take away from the courage of those who have been sent to fight in them. Today I want to take a moment to salute those who have gone to war—both those who died and those who came back changed because of what they saw and did and what happened to them.
My generation was the last to face the draft. It's hard for me to imagine the courage it took to go to war when there was a draft and the courage to choose to go when one doesn't have to go—as young men and women are doing every day now.
Today I want to honor those who have had the courage to be in the military and do what they can to keep us all safe. And to pray that soon this world finds a way to exist in peace so that no more men and women--of any nation--have to go to war. That we find a way to resolve disputes without fighting.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Time to Think
I know I'm a week late posting my blog. Sometimes I need a little extra time to think. I've been doing that the past couple of weeks—mulling over life, this writing business I'm part of, and the world in general. I don't want to waste your time with words that aren't worth reading.
My son may be going into housing. He lives with my ex-husband and has Down syndrome and is 31. It will be a momentous change for him, for my ex and in some ways for me. I hope that it will lead him to new levels of maturity. I worry he won't be able to adapt or they won't be able to handle him. I think about the extended changes this may create in all our lives. Please keep him in your prayers.
A friend will be undergoing surgery again in June. Her 8th? 9Th? since she was diagnosed with breast cancer close to two years ago. She has no markers for the cancer any more but her body has had a hard time recovering from each surgery. Please keep her in your prayers.
I've finished my most recent online class and will soon be teaching one on public speaking (especially for writers) through the Outreach Chapter of RWA (details to be posted soon). Debora Dale recently had a blog interview with me about Book in a Week at—if anyone is curious what that's like, read it here: How Writers Write - An interview with April Kihlstrom . At any rate, I've been mulling over what other classes I might offer and on what kind of schedule. If you've got a class you'd like to see, please let me know!
My daughter just took her qualifying exams in graduate school. She's brilliant and wonderful and worries about not only succeeding but also making a difference in this world. She will—I have no doubt of that. I also know she needs to know I love and believe in her. And that got me thinking how much we all need to hear that someone loves and believes in us—no matter what. How often do we think to say it to those closest to us? How often do we hear it when we need to most? What difference might it make in our relationships if we heard and said it more?
I've lost my battle to save my zucchini plant. The birds tore it to bits before I realized what was happening. I'm still hoping that at least one of my two tomato plants will produce fruit. And I'm still experimenting and thinking about ways to deal with those pesky fire ants.
So...it's been a week or two of reflection for me. Hope all is well with all of you!
My son may be going into housing. He lives with my ex-husband and has Down syndrome and is 31. It will be a momentous change for him, for my ex and in some ways for me. I hope that it will lead him to new levels of maturity. I worry he won't be able to adapt or they won't be able to handle him. I think about the extended changes this may create in all our lives. Please keep him in your prayers.
A friend will be undergoing surgery again in June. Her 8th? 9Th? since she was diagnosed with breast cancer close to two years ago. She has no markers for the cancer any more but her body has had a hard time recovering from each surgery. Please keep her in your prayers.
I've finished my most recent online class and will soon be teaching one on public speaking (especially for writers) through the Outreach Chapter of RWA (details to be posted soon). Debora Dale recently had a blog interview with me about Book in a Week at—if anyone is curious what that's like, read it here: How Writers Write - An interview with April Kihlstrom . At any rate, I've been mulling over what other classes I might offer and on what kind of schedule. If you've got a class you'd like to see, please let me know!
My daughter just took her qualifying exams in graduate school. She's brilliant and wonderful and worries about not only succeeding but also making a difference in this world. She will—I have no doubt of that. I also know she needs to know I love and believe in her. And that got me thinking how much we all need to hear that someone loves and believes in us—no matter what. How often do we think to say it to those closest to us? How often do we hear it when we need to most? What difference might it make in our relationships if we heard and said it more?
I've lost my battle to save my zucchini plant. The birds tore it to bits before I realized what was happening. I'm still hoping that at least one of my two tomato plants will produce fruit. And I'm still experimenting and thinking about ways to deal with those pesky fire ants.
So...it's been a week or two of reflection for me. Hope all is well with all of you!
Friday, May 09, 2008
The Power of Storytelling
I'm finishing up teaching my Revisions class online and I find myself thinking again about the profound power of storytelling. It's how human beings have always tried to make sense of the world and the people around them. Stories carry power. Some are true, some are not. It's not always clear to me which matter more.
It's one thing to recite statistics about, say, cancer. It's another to hear the story about the woman who lost her sister to cancer or how the children coped with the loss of their mother. It's one thing to see statistics concerning the massacre in Rwanda and another to hear the personal story of a woman who survived. It's one thing to be told we can be who we want to be and another to read about a woman like us who is true to herself and not only finds someone who accepts her but who loves her BECAUSE she is who she is.
Stories have power. And we writers get to create them. And in our stories, we can make things come out right in the end. Or, wrong in the end, if we want to provide a powerful warning about some danger.
Days like this, I can't imagine anything I'd rather be than a writer.
It's one thing to recite statistics about, say, cancer. It's another to hear the story about the woman who lost her sister to cancer or how the children coped with the loss of their mother. It's one thing to see statistics concerning the massacre in Rwanda and another to hear the personal story of a woman who survived. It's one thing to be told we can be who we want to be and another to read about a woman like us who is true to herself and not only finds someone who accepts her but who loves her BECAUSE she is who she is.
Stories have power. And we writers get to create them. And in our stories, we can make things come out right in the end. Or, wrong in the end, if we want to provide a powerful warning about some danger.
Days like this, I can't imagine anything I'd rather be than a writer.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
That Time of Year
Well, it's that time of year. Planting tomato and zucchini plants, stress for kids in college, HOA meetings.
My daughter and I had lunch at a wonderful spot in Austin this Saturday—the Eastside Cafe. Wonderful food and they have a gorgeous garden where they grow produce. Plus plants for sale. One zucchini plant and one tomato plant have gone into the ground in my back yard. Mind you, I had to get some fresh dirt first. What I have isn't the best in the world.
My daughter and I swapped grad school stories. Discovered there were things I'd never told her before. And I found myself thinking how much things have changed.
My HOA had its annual meeting this week, too. We were reminded that we're going to be annexed soon. Don't get me wrong—it's a lovely town. I'm just not so thrilled knowing how much my property taxes are going to go up as a result of our annexation! Lots of intense emotions, too, about choices the HOA will have to make about what to turn over to the city and what to keep. I found myself thinking I could see both sides and honestly didn't know which the better choice would be. Eventually I slipped out and walked back home, thinking how nice it was that I COULD walk home from where the HOA was meeting.
Mind you, this time of year also brings the annual fight against fire ants and I've had to mow my lawn quite a few times already but....still, it's a nice time of year.
Oh, and if you're curious to know more about my online Book in a Week class, Debora Dale has posted an interview with me on her blog.
My daughter and I had lunch at a wonderful spot in Austin this Saturday—the Eastside Cafe. Wonderful food and they have a gorgeous garden where they grow produce. Plus plants for sale. One zucchini plant and one tomato plant have gone into the ground in my back yard. Mind you, I had to get some fresh dirt first. What I have isn't the best in the world.
My daughter and I swapped grad school stories. Discovered there were things I'd never told her before. And I found myself thinking how much things have changed.
My HOA had its annual meeting this week, too. We were reminded that we're going to be annexed soon. Don't get me wrong—it's a lovely town. I'm just not so thrilled knowing how much my property taxes are going to go up as a result of our annexation! Lots of intense emotions, too, about choices the HOA will have to make about what to turn over to the city and what to keep. I found myself thinking I could see both sides and honestly didn't know which the better choice would be. Eventually I slipped out and walked back home, thinking how nice it was that I COULD walk home from where the HOA was meeting.
Mind you, this time of year also brings the annual fight against fire ants and I've had to mow my lawn quite a few times already but....still, it's a nice time of year.
Oh, and if you're curious to know more about my online Book in a Week class, Debora Dale has posted an interview with me on her blog.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Journeys
Every year at this time, I think of my cross country journey in 2003. It ultimately led to me settling here in the Austin area. I think with fondness of that adventure. (And I thought gas prices were high then!) It was, as one friend said at the time, a journey in emotional as well as physical miles.
Despite the concerns of some friends, I was perfectly safe going on my own. I learned a lot about myself. I learned it was okay to take wrong turns—sometimes that led to the most interesting experiences and it would turn out all right in the end any way. I learned that I could fit in anywhere. I learned that I liked people everywhere I went. I learned to let go of a lot of assumptions I had about myself and life. I learned that change was what life was all about.
Because of what I learned on that journey, I try, every year, to go new places and do new things. None of it is as grand as that cross country journey, but it doesn't have to be. Each new experience helps me grow. Each time I step outside my comfort zone, my comfort zone expands. And that's A GOOD THING.
What ways do you step outside your comfort zone? What are some of the experiences that are most vivid in your memory?
Despite the concerns of some friends, I was perfectly safe going on my own. I learned a lot about myself. I learned it was okay to take wrong turns—sometimes that led to the most interesting experiences and it would turn out all right in the end any way. I learned that I could fit in anywhere. I learned that I liked people everywhere I went. I learned to let go of a lot of assumptions I had about myself and life. I learned that change was what life was all about.
Because of what I learned on that journey, I try, every year, to go new places and do new things. None of it is as grand as that cross country journey, but it doesn't have to be. Each new experience helps me grow. Each time I step outside my comfort zone, my comfort zone expands. And that's A GOOD THING.
What ways do you step outside your comfort zone? What are some of the experiences that are most vivid in your memory?
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
How Do You Choose?
Who are you as a person? What are your priorities? How do you make choices? What are your fears? What are your hopes and dreams?
It's useful to ask ourselves those questions. Once we know, we can decide whether those answers are working for us or whether we want to rewrite them—and thereby improve our lives.
If we're writers, it's even more useful to ask ourselves these kinds of questions. If we pay attention to our own emotions and emotional responses to situations and people, then we have material for our writing, too.
Example: What is it that has allowed you at times to rise above your fears and do what's right even if you were scared or it wasn't what you wanted to do? Knowing the answer gives you a starting point for how a character in your story might grow or rise above his or her fears. If you write nonfiction, then knowing your own emotional high and low points and what works for you gives you a starting point for realizing what will matter to readers.
EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A WRITER, it is useful to ask this question! All of us find ourselves at times in situations where, if we could change so that we rose above our fears or past patterns of behavior, it would get us out of a crisis or make life easier in some way. If we know what lets us rise above our fears and past patterns, then we can consciously choose to make sure that whatever worked before is present NOW as we set about making changes.
Isn't it great to know that we CAN rewrite our lives? Just because we've always had a fear of heights or had trouble managing money or told ourselves we couldn't do X, Y or Z doesn't mean we have to keep being that way!
And if we are writers, just think of the fodder for setting up turning points for our characters or in nonfiction recognizing what our readers' concerns (and possibly objections) will be.
So what questions can you ask yourself this week? What changes could you make in your life if you did?
Best,
April
PS I'm setting up an online class on REVISIONS THE PRACTICAL WAY. (April 25 to May 9, $25). Full details are on my website April Kihlstrom.
It's useful to ask ourselves those questions. Once we know, we can decide whether those answers are working for us or whether we want to rewrite them—and thereby improve our lives.
If we're writers, it's even more useful to ask ourselves these kinds of questions. If we pay attention to our own emotions and emotional responses to situations and people, then we have material for our writing, too.
Example: What is it that has allowed you at times to rise above your fears and do what's right even if you were scared or it wasn't what you wanted to do? Knowing the answer gives you a starting point for how a character in your story might grow or rise above his or her fears. If you write nonfiction, then knowing your own emotional high and low points and what works for you gives you a starting point for realizing what will matter to readers.
EVEN IF YOU ARE NOT A WRITER, it is useful to ask this question! All of us find ourselves at times in situations where, if we could change so that we rose above our fears or past patterns of behavior, it would get us out of a crisis or make life easier in some way. If we know what lets us rise above our fears and past patterns, then we can consciously choose to make sure that whatever worked before is present NOW as we set about making changes.
Isn't it great to know that we CAN rewrite our lives? Just because we've always had a fear of heights or had trouble managing money or told ourselves we couldn't do X, Y or Z doesn't mean we have to keep being that way!
And if we are writers, just think of the fodder for setting up turning points for our characters or in nonfiction recognizing what our readers' concerns (and possibly objections) will be.
So what questions can you ask yourself this week? What changes could you make in your life if you did?
Best,
April
PS I'm setting up an online class on REVISIONS THE PRACTICAL WAY. (April 25 to May 9, $25). Full details are on my website April Kihlstrom.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
The Unexpected
It’s easy to fall into patterns of thinking we know people by what we see. If we do so, however, we miss 9/10ths of what might be there.
When you pass the overweight woman in the store, do you stop to realize she might have been an aerobics instructor?
When you see the college professor, do you picture him hiking in the woods or playing a guitar?
When you see the harried mother in the airport, does it occur to you that she might be a high powered attorney?
When you see the young man with Down syndrome does it occur to you that he might play the piano?
If you are a writer creating characters, do you think to give them the unexpected talent or background or hobby?
Our lives will be richer if we look beyond the surface to see what we might not usually stop to notice or ask about or wonder. Our lives are richer when we truly look at people, look beyond our expectations and see the person who might defy every one of them. And the stories we write will be infinitely more interesting if we add dimensions to our characters that go beyond the surface to make each one unique.
When you pass the overweight woman in the store, do you stop to realize she might have been an aerobics instructor?
When you see the college professor, do you picture him hiking in the woods or playing a guitar?
When you see the harried mother in the airport, does it occur to you that she might be a high powered attorney?
When you see the young man with Down syndrome does it occur to you that he might play the piano?
If you are a writer creating characters, do you think to give them the unexpected talent or background or hobby?
Our lives will be richer if we look beyond the surface to see what we might not usually stop to notice or ask about or wonder. Our lives are richer when we truly look at people, look beyond our expectations and see the person who might defy every one of them. And the stories we write will be infinitely more interesting if we add dimensions to our characters that go beyond the surface to make each one unique.
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